"I'm so addicted to all the things you do / When you're rollin' 'round with me in between the sheets"
Why not just whack me over the head with a two-by-four that says "I love you"?
What I'm Reading: The Book Thief by Markus Zusak.
The narrator is Death. The location is Nazi Germany. I'm thinking... upper? What I'm Writing: 23,512 words in WIP.
(I know it doesn't sound like enough of an increase from last time, especially since I went to a writing retreat in the interim, but I realized one of the scenes in my book had been doubled - copied and pasted instead of cut and pasted - and so when I deleted it... nevermind. Excuses are time-consuming to type, and not just a little boring. Sorry. Let's try it again.)
WIP: 23,512 words. I suck.
The Last Thing an Aspiring Benihana Chef Wants to See:
So, we're at Benihana yesterday for my nephew's birthday, and when the fry cook starts chucking shrimp tails, my little 2-year old nephew "A" starts crying.
We're all: "Don't be scared. The shrimp tails are harmless."
But he's still freaking out, pointing to his throat and sort of saying, "Peh... Peh..."
I'm thinking: Sheesh, this kid must hate shrimp as much as I do. So I say, "I know, little A. Pee-yuuuu."
Then my sister says: "Wait, where is that penny he was playing with?"
Nephew A points to his chest: "Peh-nee."
My sister starts freaking out, frantically searching for the penny, and so I offer her another penny, but that doesn't help.
I know what you're all thinking because I was thinking the same thing: "Why did he have to swallow it during the appetizer?"
My dad (a pediatrician) tells us to sit tight. "A" may or may not have to go to the hospital.
So our cook (a non-asian guy named Jeremy) gets a little flustered, because we're all staring at Nephew A, waiting to see if the penny suddenly bursts out of his chest or anything.
Not JeremyThe poor guy looked like we had just chopped off his hands and demanded he juggle for us.
So we were overly encouraging. "C'mon, Jer, you can do it. Wow. A volcano made of onion rings. Oooooh. Aaaaah. Don't worry- he always swallows pennies. Show us that salt trick again. You know, the one where you salt the vegetables."
The sweat dripped off his forehead as he juggled knives. It was priceless. We took Nephew A to get an x-ray, and I tagged along for the ride, because my toe was hurting.
Here's the x-ray of my foot. 
Brodi's Foot X-Ray
Brodi's Foot X-RayDon't worry. I did not break my foot in a million parallel lines; that's a banister behind the x-ray. But other than that, anyone see any anomalies? The doctor says no, but I'm pretty sure there's something funky going on there. Something that might explain why my writer's group thinks I'm number one crazy.
Oh, and Nephew A is gonna be just fine. My sister has the pleasure of... determining when and if the little penny is deposited.
Fun weekend for her. Mwah hah hah hah.
Anyone else doing anything this weekend that doesn't involve studying poop?
This reminds me of a time when Grant swallowed a picture hanging hook. Funny thing was, after frantic doctor visit and xrays, he had not swallowed it. I am proud that I have a jokester as a child, but I can't help but think that it would have been nice if he actually told us the punchline to his trick BEFORE the medical expenses were incurred...
ReplyDeleteHa ha.
ReplyDelete"it would have been nice if he actually told us the punchline to his trick BEFORE the medical expenses were incurred..."
Did the doctor laugh, at least?
In answer to Brodi's question about if the doctor laughed: The doctor laughed all the way to the bank! Ok, not very funny, I know, just wanted to join in the discussion.
ReplyDeleteAt least it was only a penny that little nephew A ate...there will be no rush to find the money that was swallowed because it was only a penny. Now, if it was a quarter, well, let the search and rescue begin!
If it was a quarter, I'd wield the butter knife myself.
ReplyDeleteAt first when I read, "The narrator is Death," I thought you meant he was boring and that you were only still reading the book because of the captivating dialog. (That's a lot of meaning to get out of one sentence.)
ReplyDeleteThen, I realized you capitalized Death, so you actually meant Death as in the person...er...whatever.
I think I swallowed a penny or a nickel when I was young. But, I never went to get x-rayed. So, I'm not sure if I just nearly swallowed them instead.
Book Thief was good. I can't remember all of it but it was a cool book. Very different.
ReplyDeleteWow, Brodi, you can even make a harrowing swallowed penny incident funny. I love the "not Jeremy" picture.
ReplyDeleteSo do your teeth feel any better. My gums hurt for weeks after I had my teeth whitened--and I'm pretty sure my teeth aren't any whiter.
Jenni- Yeah, I should be more clear when I reference Death.
ReplyDeleteCam- Yeah, I'm liking it so far. But it's not what I'd call page-turning easy reading. At least for me...
Bree- How do you tell a non-funny story about swallowing a penny? It's probably a social skill I need to learn. Like when the doctor told my mom she had to have immediate surgery for her appendix, and I laughed out loud.
I fear I may be slightly socially awkward.
The Book Thief is one of my most favorite recent book reads. I read it twice within a couple of months, and I bawled like a baby for the last 40 or 50 pages. Just warning ya. (Although my daughter didn't cry after I warned her and she didn't dare read it at school for fear that she would start crying).
ReplyDeleteThe Book Thief is one of my favorite recent reads. I read it twice in a couple of months time, and I bawled like a baby for the last 40 or 50 pages both times! (Although my daughter didn't cry at all and she didn't dare read it at school because of my warning) :)
ReplyDeletesorry for the double comment post. It told me that it didn't work, so I tried to recreate it. Oh well. :/
ReplyDeleteJenny- Some comments are just so good that destiny demands they appear two or three times.
ReplyDeletep.s. I've heard the Book Thief can be a cry-fest, and so I'm reading very, very slowly.
I'm not sure I can read that book. I barely got through Time Traveler's Wife and I couldn't read The Lovely Bones. If it is on par with those, I might just have to sit out.
ReplyDeleteI just finished The Book Thief today. It took me a while to get into the author's sense of creativity (my first impression was that he was trying to hard). But after a hundred pages or so I accepted it and then appreciated it. Why should I let my jealousy of his creativity taint my enjoyment of the book? Great characters too. I'll be looking forward to your comments when you finish.
ReplyDelete