If You're Going to Write, You're Going to have to Learn how to Wait. Here's How I Do It:

Hey y'all. 

I reached a milestone today.

1500 solitaire games won on my iPhone.

Amazing, right? I know what you're thinking: "Is there an award for such a feat?" And then you're probably thinking "Is it "feat"? or "feet"?" At least, that's what I would be thinking.

It's not like it was easy, although I do have a fairly high win percentage at around 16.0%.  (Don't anyone do the math. Okay, fine! It was 9,425 total games played.)

In my head, little tiny announcers are remarking on my moves, and questioning whether the big risks I take will be worth it. 

ex: "That's a lot of empty spaces. Ashton better hope she's got some Kings in that deck, or there could be trouble." and then the other guy says, "What a time to take chances!" because there's a million imaginary bucks on the line. 

(Solitaire play-by-play: The most coveted position in sports)

People have asked me before how I have time to blog thee days a week and write a book. Imagine what they'd think if they knew I've almost played 10,000 solitaire games as well. Which, I guess, now they do know.

So, here's the answer. (And if you're interested in any sort of writing career, this is a good thing to know):

Waiting becomes a way of life, and you have to find a way to cope.

Obviously, the best way to spend that waiting time is by writing your next project. I've done that before. But there are certain times on the path to publication where you have to wait, and your brain can't function enough to write. 

This week has been a series of spurts and stops, and I have a severe case of whiplash. And it feels delicious. And now I'm waiting again.

I can't wait to tell y'all about it. (Okay, I guess I just did.) In the meantime, raise a glass: To friends old and new, who love Diet Coke as much as I do. 

I love all of my blog readers, but especially you. And you. 

So, what do y'all do to pass the time? Can anyone share some internet word games, or something? I'm lookng to diversify. 

And what's everyone doing this weekend?

Waiting on the Publishing World? Why Not Write a song about Writer's Block?

So, on this Wednesday, of a particularly long week, I'd like to talk about waiting. I know many of you are in the middle of talking to/submitting to/querying to many prospective agents/editors/publishers, and if you've had a taste of the process at all, you know there's a lot of waiting involved.

Waiting.

Waiting.

And then some more waiting.

So, I thought I'd share with you some of my techniques to pass the time while you're waiting. (Let me preface this by saying, I also read books and work on other projects. On occasion, I even feed the kids. But sometimes, I'm just waiting.)

1. Solitaire

The other day, I reached 666 wins. I'm not normally a superstitious person, but you can bet I stayed up the extra two hours that night until I turned that win number to a more appropriate 667.

15.7 win percentage. 4,279 games played. As the Marines say, Hoo Wah.

(Of course, when they are yelling it as they invade countries, I'm sure they're thinking, "America rules!" and probably not, "Did you see that chick post the 15.7 win percentage? Hooo Wahhh!"

2. Turn your book into a cheesy, lego-like cartoon trailer.

During one wait last year, I made a cartoon preview for my first book Echo, just for my own kicks and giggles. Here it is:

3. Write a Song... and then record yourself singing it.

And this is the one colossal waste of time I can't believe I'm about to share with you. But, in honor of American Idol starting up, and those sad sacks that crashed and burned last night in front of all of the country, I shall push forward.

During one of my more manic waiting periods, I wrote a song. (A "Manic Wait" is the same as a "Wait", only with more pills.)

It's about writer's block. And I wrote it to the tune of that classic Suzanne Vega song "Tom's Diner".

If that wasn't embarassing enough, I recorded my own version of WRITER'S BLOCK. Me singing.

Those of you who've met me in person know my speaking voice resembles a chipmunk with two acorns shoved up his nostrils. Well, my singing voice is even better.

Since it's humiliating and just plain really really bad, I thought it would be perfect for my blog. I've also included the lyrics, in case you can't understand my singing. Unfortunately, the GarageBand application on my Mac makes my voice very clear. Again, this is unfortunate.

So, below, I present to you... Brodi Ashton, singing WRITER'S BLOCK, to Tom's Diner. (The lyrics are included below. You can sing along. Just follow the bouncing ego.)

I am sitting in my bedroom

Told my hubby this is “working”
I am waiting for the answers
To my villain’s motivations

And it’s hard to concentrate
And before I even know it
I am looking out the window
Are those doggies walking by?

(Doo doo’s)

Then I head to the store
Family says I need to feed them
And I watch for inspiration
Maybe it’s around the corner

There’s a guy at the counter
And he’s looking kind of iffy
Maybe he’s got superpowers
And he’ll make a good villain

(doo doo’s)

Do his eyebrows knit together?
How do eyebrows “knit together”?

I opened up the file
Oh this dialogue it is cliché
Who writes this sappy drivel?
Oh yeah, that would be me.

And I’m turning to the keyboard
And I’m writing random letters
When I’m feeling someone watching me
Oh yay, it’s the mailman!

There’s a letter meant for me
Is my agent gonna drop me?

There’s a woman on the outside from my church
Does she see me?
No she does not really see me
Cuz I’m hiding ‘neath the counter

And I’m thinking it’s okay
cuz I swear I’m on a roll

Only thirty thousand more words
It’s like I’m almost done

Now I’m jumping with my son
Did you see the way my arm moves?

Writer’s block it will continue through the morning as I’m listening for the voice of revelation…

I don’t hear it even now
And maybe now I hear it
But it’s telling me my book sucks
I look at the clock
It’s time to go to bed

Are you wondering how in the world I have such time to waste? Well, let me tell you, It's not easy, but I can waste time with the best of them. Give me an hour, and no matter how busy I am, I guarantee you I can waste it.

How about y'all? What do you do to pass the time?