Be Vewwwy Vewwy Quiet. I'm Hunting Vampires.

And the winner of Kristen Landon's LIFE IN THE PIT is...

Rue

Congratulations! Email me your address: brodiashton (at) gmail (dot) com.

I won't be here Friday. My family is driving to Washington State, where we will be swinging from the trees for about nine days. Don't worry about my fish. We have friends house-sitting, and they are perfectly capable of killing a fish. 

I've never been to Washington state, so I've been studying maps of the area. Here's a general map of the state. The yellow star is where we're going.

Let's zoom in a bit.

Yep. It's the Olympic Peninsula. I can't wait, because I've never been there, but I've heard it's beautiful. I've also heard it rains a lot. And I've heard there are quite a few unexplained disappearances and an extraordinary number of animal maulings. 

I see something over on the other side of the peninsula. Let's zoom in even closer.

 

Whoa. That does not look safe. Thank goodness I'll be on the east side of the peninsula. Let's zoom in to the area where I'll be, and see if it's any better.

What? An entire region full of sexy vamps and weres, and I get the werewolf with 80's Richard Marx hair playing air guitar and the vamp with the high collar and the creepy-old-man look? No way do I want to confess my innermost secrets to him. Mostly I just wanna keep my kids away from him.

Where are the vamps that sparkle? I WANT SPARKLIES!

Vampiric Jack Bauer has a point there. 

So, wish me a safe voyage in the great Northwest. If I'm not lucky enough to run into sparkly vamps, here's hoping for a sasquatch sighting.

Blogging might be a bit sporadic, but I'll try to update y'all on the adventures!

De-Lurking, My Favorite Vamps, and Your Chance to Win a Free Book

It's that time of the month again... Time to De-Lurk!

Any lurkers out there? If so, prepare to be outed. Welcome to the lurker Debutante Ball, where you may dress all in white and unleash yourself onto society by answering any, all, or none of the following questions:

1. What's your name?
2. Where are you from?
3. Favorite book or tv show?
4. Twizzlers or Red Vines?
5. Do you love Rafa as much as I do?
6. Thing that must go:
7. Age of first kiss:
8. Have you ever slapped someone in the face? I've always wanted to, in one of those dramatic moments, but I've never had the opportunity.
9. Have you seen Jacob's abs? If so, what do you think? Bree thinks he needs to pull up his pants.
10. Free question- anything you want to share! (PG rated please. I'm talking to you, Cam.)

Also, regular commentators, I expect you to answer some of these too. Because otherwise, when the lurkers chicken out (it's in their nature by very definition... they're lurkers), and nobody comments, I will feel like a loser. More so than usual.

Naming Lurker Names (because discomfort is sorta becoming a blog tradition around here): Suzie S. I know you're out there. And Cousin A, it doesn't count to "phone in" your comment.

Whew. I hate to have to get after y'all.

What's that you say? You need the proper motivation? How about, a free book of your choosing from Amazon. Taaa Daaa. Anyone who comments today gets entered in the drawing. We haven't done one of these in a bazillion years.

TRASHY MAG UPDATES (For those of you who would like to read them, but are too ashamed to admit it)

I don't know if you've heard, but vampires are sorta hot right now, a theme which coincides with today's Trashy Mag installment.

Entertainment Weekly is holding a contest (a bi-weekly event) to vote for the hottest vampire (sure to be Edward) in the history of the world (the past two years, really).

Also gracing the cover, looking definitely deader and fangy-er than Edward, is Bill from True Blood.

Okay, they're both hot. Whatev's. But if I was really going for all-time faves, like from the 1900's and beyond, my personal list would start with...

1. ANGEL
Vampire, cursed with a soul? Conflicted? Doesn't sparkle in the daylight? Ahhhhhh.

Angel: Sparkles are for Sissies... He Buuurrrrnnnnnsss.

2. SPIKE
Original Bad-Arse Vamp. Started out very bad. Ended up semi-bad. Always hot, especially with the accent.

Spike, you are missed.

Spike: So good when you're bad. Even better when your good.

3. ERIC
I in no way endorse the show he's on, because we are a PG rated blog. (Okay, PG-13, but mostly because of you racy commentators...) And I absolutely do not recall watching the show, or if he's even on a show. (How's that for plausible deniability?)

But, Eric. I love to hate him. He puts the "man" in "Norsman". Okay, I don't really know what that means... but I often lose track of logic when I'm staring at his picture:

(Don't worry. It's fruit punch)
Eric: As they say in your homeland, "Eg elskar deg"
Do you love me too?

4. NOSFERATU
Because if you know me, then you know any vampire list has to include good ole Nosferatu. To remind us that vampires were not always considered hot.

Nosferatu: UnDead... and UnHot... and possibly Crippled

So, who would make your supernatural list?