Okay, so my dad had this disease called Celiac, which meant he couldn't have a trace of gluten (wheat, flour, barley, etc.)
So, none of this stuff:
After he passed away last month, my family (mom, sister's fam and my fam) went up to our condo in Midway. It was our first trip there without him, so it was bittersweet to say the least. But while we were up there, we ordered a couple of giant pizzas from this Italian pizza joint.
We were so excited because it was the first time in 25 years we'd ordered pizza as a family. Up until last month, we never (as a family) wanted to order something with gluten in it, out of respect for my dad's disease.
Well, my family hasn't stopped talking about last week's night of pizza. My sister spoke of the pizza like it had just been invented the night before.
She's all, "It's cheese AND sauce AND bread! It's a miracle!"
We immediately made plans to go to the condo in Midway again, just so we could order that pizza.
But then three days later, I got a call from my doctor's office.
"I'm calling about the results of your blood test. And... you've tested positive for celiac disease."
It kinda sucks. But the best part of whole thing has been the reactions I've gotten from my family and friends.
I'll share them with you. These are the conversations that follow after the announcement, "I have Celiac disease."
Bree Despain (who is gluten-intolerant): "I knew it! I diagnosed that for you, like, weeks ago! And I didn't even need the blood test to prove it! Welcome to hell. Haha!"
my mom: "Oh, I'm so thrilled! It's like your dad left a little piece of himself behind for us."
me: "Um, if he wanted to leave a piece, I would've preferred his big heart, over his faulty intestines..."
also my mom: "Okay, we had pizza last weekend, and I don't know about you, but I felt just dang crappy afterward, so this works out great. You couldn't have asked for better news."
To be fair, any news that doesn't involve the word "cancer" is good news in our family.
My sister: "Seriously? Crap! Does that mean no more pizza? What are we going to eat over Memorial Day weekend? Couldn't you have planned to get the diagnosis later?"
me: "I've heard that a gluten-free diet is sort of healthy. At least, healthier than eating all that bread."
sister (with jealousy in her voice): "Really? Then I'm going gluten-free too, and don't try to stop me. It's not all about you."
So, I know it's not a big deal. But it's going to be a little difficult going "Gluten-Free" because I've been on the "Go Gluten or Go Home" diet for so long.
I met with the doctor again, hoping that the blood test might have been a little inconclusive, but she told me that on the celiac scale of 1-10, my blood test came back at 72.
Below, I present something this world has never seen before... nay, something this universe has never seen before...
BRODI'S LAST BITE OF PIZZA
In other great news, I'll be in San Francisco at Books Inc. for a book event with the amazing Bree Despain and Cynthia Hand tomorrow night.
If you are in the area, or know anyone in the area, take pity on a gluten-free soul and spread the word! And if you have any good GF tips or recipes, send them my way.