Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Three Things I've Learned over the last Two Weeks

Hey y'all. 

Three things I've learned over the last two weeks. 

1. Humor can go a long way. 

In the hospital, we were showing my father the latest Mission Impossible movie. We had to pause it at one point, so the nurse - the awesome Bradley - could give my dad his medicine. He had to deliver the medicine in an unconventional way because my dad was so nauseous, so my mom, my sister and I stepped outside to give him room.

When Bradley came out into the hallway afterward, he pulled off his latex gloves and announced, "You won't see that on Mission Impossible!"

He was right. We didn't see it. 

2. Some gifts shouldn't be acknowledged. 

My family is all for organ donation. If there is a chance someone can live, or thrive, because of a gift from someone who is dying, we support it. We were lucky enough to be able to donate the corneas of my dad's eyes, and we didn't hesitate. We are thrilled that someone who couldn't see will now be able to view life through a different perspective. 

However, in recognition of the donation, the eye and cornea organization sent me a thank you card, and a plastic three ring binder with some sort of saying printed on the front about how to deal with the loss of a loved one.

Now all I can think is, "We gave you my dad's eyes, and you gave us a Trapper Keeper!"

2. a. Sometimes my grief manifests itself in anger. 

Forgive me. 

3. I am not alone. 

We have been fed, embraced and ministered to by countless friends and loved ones. As my friend Sally says, I'm now a member of the "Cancer took my dad" club, where the price of membership is way too high, but you're never alone. 

There's no gesture of support more organic than catching someone else's tears, and my tears have been caught so many times. They've never hit the ground. 

Thank you to everyone, for catching my tears. 

And now, as my dad said during his last day in this life, "Let's move forward."


  1. Absolutely gorgeous. I'm crying. Can't believe I was just standing in the same room as that smiling man and now you're left to deal without him. I'm so sorry Brodi.

  2. I am truly so sorry for your loss! I am crying just reading your post and I didn't even know your dad! You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers!


  3. Love you love you <3 x 1 million & 3

  4. I'm in that club too. A sucky club to be in, but definitely has some great members and great friends. You will make it through and my prayers are with you.

  5. well said as always!

  6. Thank you for sharing cuz. Love you all!!

  7. "Let's move forward." That is beautiful Brod. And I'm here for you. To catch tears, listen to a rant, take your boys so they can plan on our new swing set. I want to help. And what an amazing sense of humor you all have. Your attitude and words and peace blew me away Monday evening (and at the funeral). All of you. Love you.

  8. I may not be in the cancer took my dad club, but I am in the cancer has taken my loved ones club and I agree, the price is way too high, but you are NEVER alone. Love you and praying for you and your family. *hugs*

  9. There are some things we do not wish to learn. How to handle the death of your parent is not high on any list. I scratched that one off a long time ago with a rating of "poorly done".

    One day at a time as you move forward.

    (((Hugs from Texas)))

  10. It is amazing how quickly grief throws you from humor to anger to tears. But thank goodness for those breaks from the tears, even the Trapper Keeper–induced anger. Wishing I could give you a big hug!

  11. Beautiful post. You're amazing, I'm wishing you the best.

  12. I have so little to offer but I do offer you my most heartfelt prayers on your behalf.

  13. My prayers to you and your family. My grief sometimes manifest itself in humor. I have to apologize for that as well.

  14. You've been in my thoughts. My grandma was diagnosed with renal cancer last month. I hurt for you and your family.

  15. Um, I guess you didn't get the membership rules I sent with the Trapper Keeper?

    The first rule about Cancer..Dad club is you don't talk about the Club.


  16. Wow, this touched me so much I don't know what to say...

    My dad has cancer and while he's still in stage 1, I keep thinking of what might come...

    I don't want to join the Cancer Took My Dad club... but if ever the membership is forced upon me, I have to say... that I will be glad to know that there will be wonderful, loving, thoughtful, and funny people like you in it.

    - Esther

  17. Lovely post, Brodi. Made me cry. *hugs*

  18. my heart goes out to you and your family, Brodi.

  19. Truly he was a great and wonderful husband, dad, grandpa, doctor, and friend to all. I have enjoyed reading the Clot over the years to kindof keep up on the situation. Couldn't tell who was writing it...you or your mom. It was always hilarious and warm at the same time. He leaves a great legacy that is reflected in his family and remembered by his friends. I'm always glad that I was his brother....albeit from afar. God bless you all.

    Love ya, Dave

  20. Thank you for that lovely phrase- 'catching someone else's tears'. That's surely what true friends and family do for us. I'm sorry your Dad wasn't able to win that battle.

  21. that was very touching