Book status: Revising.
Sometimes Neuroses are Totally Justified
So I've got a few things I'm a little neurotic about (refrain from interjecting, please).
1. After dishing out ice cream, I have to rinse off the spoon before I will use it to eat the ice cream.
2. If I finish my bowl of cereal, and I want more, I have to rinse out the bowl before I fill it up again. Even if it's the same cereal.
3. I can't sleep if my sheets have a wrinkle in them.
4. I can't sleep if Sam's touching me. (I know, I know. He's so lucky to have me.)
5. I can't sleep if he's breathing. (This one proves difficult sometimes).
6. If Sam drinks out of my Diet Coke, I won't drink the rest. It has nothing to do with cooties, or anything. I'm just very particular about the integrity of the drink.
I know what you're thinking: "Integrity of the drink? Is she crazy?"
But when it comes to preserving and protecting the perfect glass of Diet Coke, I am an expert. I'm not just bragging. (I know, I know. No one would really 'brag' about such a lame-o quirk).
But we have conducted scientific experiments on the subject.
Last summer, we went to Hilton Head Island with my sister and her family, and my parents. And they all got to making fun of me about my obsessive way of pouring the diet coke into the glass. (There's a special technique in the pouring that will preserve the most bubbles).
I know what you're thinking: "There's also a special place they send people like you."
So, my family created a "bubble challenge". (Because that's what you do when you're on vacation at the beach, right?)
They presented two identical glasses. Into one, I poured half a can of diet coke MY way, and then my bro-in-law poured the rest into the second glass THEIR way.
Then they blindfolded me, and switched the glasses around.
And just by the taste, I could tell which glass had been poured by me, and which one had been poured by them.
Fluke, you think?
We repeated the experiment several times. (Because it was raining outside, and because my family is made up of dorks). And my guessing percentage was a stunning 100%.
So, this just goes to prove... I'm not sure. But it has something to do with vindication!
I'm off to eat a healthy breakfast of Diet Coke and Mentos.
What? Is there a problem with that? I've got a brother-in-law on Sam's side who conducts experiments on this all the time...
Yeah, he's a dork too.