Friday, May 29, 2009

The One Man in the World who Looks Good in Hot Pink

How you can tell when people have too much time on their hands:
When we were at King's English the other night, my friend Emily Wing Smith received one of the funniest parking complaints I've ever seen, and she tells the story
here. Check it out if you want a laugh. (And if you happen to be the person who wrote it, my apologies.)

Who says men can't look good in hot pink?
Well, I do for one. In fact, the "No Hot Pink on Sam" rule was written into our marriage contract. So Rafa's latest ensemble in the French Open proves he is not just an ordinary man.

Also, I just finished reading The Road by Cormac McCarthy.

Wow.

It's about a father and a son who are stranded in the burned out shell of what was once Earth, struggling to survive. (After an un-named apocalyptic event.) It was gripping, disturbing and tender, so, yeah, I loved it.

My biggest problem with the book was that the event was never explained, and my obsessive little brain couldn't handle it. My mind would start wandering, trying to account for why everything in their world is on fire, and three pages would go by.

Therein lies the rub. Cormac McCarthy uses words I've never heard of, and he uses them a lot. So a mere glance of the sentences would not dump any actual information in my brain. McCarthy has an insane mastery of the English language.

For instance:
“He rose and stood tottering in that cold autistic dark with his arms outheld for balance while the vestibular calculations in his skull cranked out their reckonings.”

I had to read the darn sentence like three times before I finally figured out what the heck he was talking about. Apparently only brilliant people get stranded in the post-apocalyptic world.

Maybe I'm just jealous, because I would have written the above sentence like this:
“He stood up and looked around.”

And if my book had young gay lovers in it, I would have said "young gay lovers". I wouldn't have thought there was a specific word for it. Catamites. There's your vocabulary word for the day. Try using it in a sentence.

That's why Cormac McCarthy has Nobel prizes and stuff. He knows those words exist. And he would never use the word "stuff".

The Road is going to be a movie in October. Here's the trailer.



What are y'all doing this weekend?

18 comments:

  1. I am also of the "He stood up and looked around" variety when it comes to diction. I think too many three- to four-syllable words in one sentence is overkill. That sentence makes me think the author is compensating for something...or he's rubbing it in that his vocabulary is eleventy billion times the size of mine. Ouch. Plus, no one really talks like that.

    No firm plans for me this weekend. Perhaps I'll soak up some sun...or try to catch one of the zillion movies my husband and I haven't seen because we never have time/money/a babysitter.

    (Can you tell I'm slightly prone to exaggeration?)

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  2. Oh...one more thing.

    I ADORE it when angry people leave notes on your car/makes their kid chase you down with a note when you park in a way that displeases them. It happened to my husband and me one time when we completely inadvertenly "stole" someone's parking spot at a busy movie theater (they didn't have their blinker on, so, in my opinion, the spot was fair game). The disgruntled driver used some colorful language and told us that "karma would get us when we least expected it".

    If someone accidentally taking my parking spot is the worst thing I have to look out for in life, I think I can handle it.

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  3. What? There was no contract that I signed that prohibited me from wearing hot pink. Seriously, I got some awesome looking pink polos from Banana Republic last weekend. You will be shocked at my metrosexiness.

    My plans this weekend consist of entertaining you, hanging with the kids, gardening and probably a little bit of just shaking my money maker.

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  4. Not a fan of pink on men. But I gotta say you're right, the hottie Rafa can pull it off just fine. In fact it was like the 3rd thing I looked at so there is proof.

    Too funny about Emily's parking experience. Had to go share the love with her.

    Weekend plans: My sisters-in-law have a yearly retreat in May. There are 7 girls and my mother in law at a cabin Fri-Sun. I can't wait. Headed there right now!

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  5. Wow, I haven't heard of The Road, looks intriguing, thanks for the clip!

    I agree, there is only so many SAT vocabulary words you can fit into a sentence before it stops being literature and becomes a lesson in how the author is better than you. Or just makes me feel incredibly inferior because I am forced to look up definitions so I can understand a simple sentence.

    I can completely relate to the story of the note. It happened to my hubby and I when were just engaged, in Bakersfield visiting his parents. It was before Christmas and we went to the mall to shop. As we were coming around (mind you, driving the 15 MPH max) a truck tried to speed down another parking aisle, cut a corner to try to take the parking spot we were heading to. Luckily our safe driving got us there before the crazy truck's driving did so we parked. When we left the mall and returned to the car there was a note about how we stole their parking spot. Best part of the note, "Thank you for ruining our Christmas." Yup...parking in that stall ruined their Christmas - I was awed we had so much power. Not to mention, there was plenty of parking down the row...they just wanted the close one. This statement has become a fun cliche in our family.

    This weekend I hope to rest, read, attend a graduation BBQ for an employee and take my adopted 'sis' and her mom out to brunch to celebrate Mom's birthday that past and "Sis's" graduation from silly *ahem* city college. I'm thrilled she's going on to university!

    What are you doing Brodi? Sounds like hubby might be trying spoil you or butter you up for something.

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  6. Jess- "eleventy billion". lol.

    Sam- shake that money maker. I've got the one-dollar bills ready.

    Debbie- I'm jealous of the cabin weekend. You're not bringing kids, are you? Because then the jealousy would, like, disappear.

    Una- "Thank you for ruining Christmas." People are so funny. And by funny, I mean sorta pathetic. I can just imagine the truck driver's family, waking up on Christmas, nobody smiling, no cheer, thinking "curse that Una! Let's just go back to bed."
    Great story.

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  7. I just read The Road maybe 6 months ago. It is so disturbing and depressing, but I also really liked it. Weird how that is. I found myself wondering what had happened a lot too. And also wondering what I would do in that situation. The movie looks like it might be pretty true to the book, but I don't know if I could handle watching it!

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  8. Colleen- You're exactly right. It's depressing, and bleak, and I probably wouldn't read it again anytime soon, yet I loved it.

    I'm not sure if I could handle some of the more disturbing aspects of the book on the big screen... Reading about them was hard enough!

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  9. "The Road" looks like my kind of movie: the happy, romantic, light-hearted, totally predictable kind. I might be renting that one in the dead of winter. "Dead" not really being the operative word.

    Plus, I think people who have large vocabularies are usually the ones who get the nobel prizes. No one else is smart enough to contradict what the heck they are saying. I like the easier, lesser worded sentences much better anyways.

    And I think Sam would look hot in pink too. You really should give him a chance. I hear pink looks good on larger men anyway :)

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  10. Erin- you are so in trouble when I tell Sam what you said... :)

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  11. Brod! The Road was my top fiction pic for 2007. I LOVED it! There was something so beautiful in the father/son relationship and the ending I found to be surprisingly hopeful. Didn't you love their conversations? I read that McCarthy sat in diners and cafes just listening to people talk - to establish the dialogue in his book. It's exactly how we talk, little punctation, fluid. I think it's his best work yet. Glad you liked it too!

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  12. Cath- the relationship between father and son was my absolute favorite aspect of the book. Every conversation between them was a thing of beauty. Tender and sweet.

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  13. Erin--you are no longer a sister to me. Please be offended when I refuse to speak to you. Sheesh, it was a BAD camera angle. I am actually underweight for my height.

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  14. Hey Sam--I so did not mean to offend you when I said "large". What I meant to say was Jolly...pink looks good on jolly people.

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  15. That looks pretty good! My niece was recommended that book. I think I'll take a look at it, but I'm with you and the vocabulary. Just say it like it is. Although, maybe that's why authors like Jane Austen and Charles Dickens are considered classics, whereas authors like JK Rowling and Stephenie Meyer aren't....

    As far as the weekend, I cleaned my house, slept a lot, and went to a party with a bunch of friends. It was awesome. Oh, and I saw Up. It was good and a little sad.

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  16. Hi Brodi.........
    I may not look good wearing pink, but on Wednesday I will be "wearing" a pink item (but not clothes) and I know I will be loving it...a lot....lol Kenny, NY

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  17. Jenni- definitely give The Road a try. And Up made you cry? Then I'm so not seeing that!

    Kenny- Go for strawberry. Inhale once for me!

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  18. LOL.....Wasn't sure if you would get the meaning of my message. Maybe strawberry, maybe bubblegum, but it any event, mmmmmmmm...sweet. My appt is Wednesday and I can't wait :) Kenny

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