Friday, October 1, 2010

What NOT to Say as an Introductory Tweet, Apparently

So, after the book deal was announced, my critique partner Bree Despain sent out a Tweet, telling her followers to follow me. She must be very powerful, because immediately I got like a hundred new followers. Bree said something like, "You'll love her. She's hilarious."

That made me nervous. I had all these new followers, and now Bree was promising them I'd be hilarious. I never feel unfunnier (less funny?) than when someone says stuff like that.  I felt like the new people were sitting around, watching Twitter, going, "Okay, Brodi, do something funny."

*Side note: I've typed "funny" so many times now, that it's starting to not look like a real word, but more an amalgam of "fluffy bunny".

So, just to give people a taste of what it will really be like to follow me, I sent this tweet:

Wow. Lot's of new followers. Hi! Here's an introductory tweet: I have a strange zit on my bellybutton. Who knew that was even possible?

I think I instantly lost 50 of the new followers, (one even tweeted about how bellybuttons make her uncomfortable, and I'm thinking, "Why? At least 99% of people have them. The uncomfortable part should be that there's a zit on the bellybutton, not the button itself.") and Bree sent a follow-up tweet:  

I send you new followers and you start tweeting about bellybutton zits???

*added: she also added "That's why I love you."

The truth is, I didn't want anyone's expectations to be too high. I thought my tweet was a typical example of what I have in the brains, and a good chance to say, "If you like the tweet, there's more where that came from. If not, get out now."

Because if there's anything I truly hate, it's failing to meet expectations. So let's lower that bar, people. You know the saying, "Aim for the stars. You're bound to hit the moon." Let's amend that to "Aim for the roof of my house. Perhaps even the tops of the trees. Hope we don't get caught in the branches. Then we can be pleasantly surprised if we clear the trees."

Who's with me? May I please have a holler? (I can't speak street, let alone type it.)

I had a great time at Matt Kirby's book launch last night. I'll give a full report of the event on Monday. (But I'd appreciate it if you'd only expect half a report, and then you can be pleasantly surprised when I post the full one.)

What are y'all up to this weekend? I've got soccer games up to my ears, and then my mom's making soup. Mmmmmm.....


  1. Ehem- For the sake of integrity of blogging everywhere, I would like your followers to know that you cut my tweet short.

    What I fully said, and this is a direct quote:
    "I send you new followers and you start tweeting about bellybutton zits??? That's why I love you."

    As in, I LOVED that your introductory tweet was funny and yet wonderfully inappropriate.

    Seriously, that's why I love you. Now don't crack under the pressure!

  2. Bree- I cut off the tweet, because it was a tender moment between me and you. But fine, I guess we're now sharing our love with the world.

    I love you too!

  3. In all honesty, your tweet could've been a lot worse. No money was added to the booby jar which I pointed out on Twitter. And, there was no talk about pus. So, I think those new followers should be grateful, even if they don't know what they're grateful for. ;)

  4. Jenni- You're right! Everyone should be grateful I didn't tweet about pus. We all know the chances of any of my tweets to be about pus are better than average.

  5. I totally shoot for the stars in everything that I do. I am a go getter. Sadly, I fail in almost everything. Except for having an awesome wife. I totally succeeded in that. I rock.

    You totally shot for the stars too in finding a husband...and you got yourself a trophy husband.

    It worked out for both of us.

    And yes...I know it totally worked out better for me than you, but thats fine by me! And everyone -- save the remarks 'go get a room!' I am all about the PDA in blogging.

  6. Sam- When we met, it was like two stars colliding in the skies, scattering shattered pieces of body all over the earth, as if it were raining entrails.

    Okay, maybe I'm not so good at the mushy stuff.

  7. Good thinking. Throw out the zit stuff and get them started on the right foot.

    It was great to see you yesterday. And your mom and dad too! How fun.

  8. Oh my! Congrats about the book deal!! (I must have had a busy busy week because I didn't see the news until just now. YAY!!) I so look forward to read it/them!

    And as for what I'm doing this weekend? Reading Matt Kirby's book of course! :)

  9. I personally think both zits and belly buttons are funny - so you're off to a good start with me at least :)


  10. Emily- If you love zits and bellybuttons, we're all set to be BFF's!

  11. WTH?! I ignore my google reader for a couple weeks and all sorts of craziness breaks forth! CONGRATS on the book deal!!!!!!!
    Now I have to figure out how to get meself an ARC... hmmm....

    LOVE your tweet. Hilarious.

    Only one soccer game for us, thank heavens....

  12. Britt- Thanks! Let me know if you get your hands on an ARC. I want one of those.

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