Twitter Status: I have joined. Or perhaps the word should be “converted”. I now can Tweet. (I finally discovered the difference between a “Twitter” and a “Tweet”. One can be a noun or a verb, the other is purely a verb with occasional dangling participle properties. I hope that clears it up for everyone. )
My problem with Twitter is that it centers on one supposedly fascinating question- the question that every person in the world has on the tip of their tongues. No, not the meaning of life. No, not the key to cold fusion. Not even the answer to world peace, or why my hair doesn’t like me, or why it must pour when it rains. And don’t get me started on the Chicken V. Egg riddle.
The question is (and everybody say it with me…): What are you doing?
So here’s the conundrum. The eternal answer for 99% of us is (everybody say it with me.. ): Absolutely Nothing. And even if I am doing something, it’s usually not noteworthy.
Seriously, at what point would you actually care what someone is doing? For me, someone would have to be training puppies to fly through a ring of fire… and even then there would have to be pictures involved.
Just once, I wanna see this for a status update:
“Jenny Smith is watching a man - dressed all in black - combat crawl his way through the bushes in her front yard, toward her door. And… what’s that glinting metal object in his hand, reflecting the moonlight? It looks kinda sharp. And, why is he wearing a mask? She’ll keep you posted…”
You can bet I’d be waiting on pins and needles for her next status update! I’d probably cook up some popcorn to chow while I stared at my computer screen.
It wouldn’t hit me until the next day that I should have called the cops or something.
So, here’s a challenge to us all:
Let’s snazzy up those twitter tweets. (You see how the “Twitter” modified the “Tweet” in that sentence? Now is it clear?)
Let’s make it so that when our friends run into us at the grocery store, the first words out of their mouths will be something along the lines of, “Brodi! You’re alive! So, was it a knife in the guy’s hand?”
Or: “I had no idea you could Twitter while flying through the air, without a parachute! I was wondering how that turned out for ya!”
Or: “I know what you mean. I had a goiter that did that exact same thing, except it didn’t explode.”
So, here’s to making memorable Tweets. If you would like to… umm… what’s the appropriate lingo? If you’d like to Tweet my Twitters, I think you just click on the link in the sidebar. Pretty soon, you’ll be living at your computer. Just like me.